Saturday, September 27, 2003

 

For the past couple of weeks, I have been seriously depressed.
A few entries ago, I made one about Cynthia Doyon, who died on August 6th of a self-inflicted gunshot wound. It was a tremendous shock to me. I never met her, but she was ranked in my mind as one of my very best friends. Read the entry and the news stories from the links below. The problem here is that it hit me so hard, like a member of my family had died. And then, 2 weeks ago, another friend (estranged somewhat) of mine died, from an overdose of medication, possibly intentional. I have been in touch with a grief counsellor and found out I am not alone. The counsellor said she had had this happen before and in fact, since Ms. Doyon died, she (the counsellor) had several people contact her in exactly the same manner as I did and feeling the same as I am feeling about losing Cynthia. There is a thing which happens to us human beings; we care about things which sometimes make no sense, but it happens because this thing becomes a part of us in some way which connects, even if it is simply a voice in the air from a radio station. We can become attached to this thing which we have no direct contact with, but which becomes an integral part of living, as something which is a constant influence, which has a very real effect though only by inference. So, I'm not alone in feeling a tremendous sense of loss, of grief for the passing of a person I never met, but who I KNEW through our tenuous contact, even though it was completely one-sided. Cynthia Doyon became an important part of my life and I miss her very much.

Posted by: Rowlfe - at: 9/27/2003 09:15:00 PM

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